After Christmas 2010

Hello my darling Hayden. As I told you I will update you on how Christmas day was 2010. In spite of everything it wasn't to bad, you and your mum and dad came over and your aunty Jess was here with her partner.We had many presents for you , and at first you were real quiet and not sure of things, but you often did this (quiet at first ) and as you relaxed you start to enjoy your self, I have my own theory to why you did this but that is not important at the moment. You and your mum and dad came over the next day and staid the night and this is the first time I have seen just how much you have grown up as you plaid so beautifully and rode your three wheeler bike we just bought you ,it was so amazing and you were so so happy. The rest is a history .I love you my baby my Hayden Lee with all of my heart for ever and ever, I hope you always do well and you will never be controlled by anyone and you will be free to be the beautiful you that I can see in your spirit as a young man. When you read this please look at your life and ask your self am I totally free and confident to be me and not worry about anything anyone says and if you feel in anyway that you are not free no mater from what , please find out why and free your self.

My darling the joy you brought in to my life I can not describe and the way that you love to be with me and grandad is just magic, the way you put your little hand out for us to hold and walk around with you is just heart melting, my baby boy we loved every minute of it, there was nothing that grandad and I would have rather done than spend time with you. Right at this time of your life you are just so full of questions about everything so you would just grab our hand and go around and point to everything and ask the question ; WHATS THAT and on and on to different things . Agh and you just loved lights at this stage of your life , so for Christmas we put as many lights up as we could ( JUST FOR YOU ) so your little eyes can see and be amazed.   Hayden Hayden Lee , some would say that me especially was to obsessed  with you , if I was its because I totally was if you call it obsession I just loved you so much and loved being with you and seeing you grow and help you learn and be there when ever I was needed. The joy a grandchild brings is just unreal but sometimes that gets taken away for one reason or another.

Hayden lee Nothing is more precious then watching your face light up when you play with us.

We love you our baby Hayden Lee.

Family is who we look to when we need help. We expect our parents to raise us, our grandparents to love us, and our brothers and sisters to always be there for us when the chips are down. They are our blood and we depend on that connection. When a family member doesn't live up to our expectations we feel abandoned. When a parent, grandparent or older brother or sister puts their needs in front of our own, we feel abandoned and alone. In such a case, we are likely to feel sad, alone and angry.Life is full of sunrises Hayden and you just don't know where the disappointment will come from so learn how to rely on your own abilities for everything and what you get from friends and family is an extra blessing but not your life recourse.

Hayden we will take you to dreamworld soon can not wait for that. ( Your first time )

Take care my darling my little man.

I love you Hayden Lee.

 Hello My darling

We have been to dreamworld and you had so much fun. Your favorite thing at dreamworld was any LIGHTS that you could find around the place as you are so fascinated by them.Still we took you on lots of rids and you just loved being with us.

On the way home... and I may add all the way home the three of us plaid a game : LIKE ; Hayden has been to dreamworld and than we would all clap hands and you got right in to it , with a new something Hayden had done and than just clap hands and say ; yeeeeeeeeeeey.

I love you my darling my Hayden Lee. The rest is a history as once again we run run in to some issues with your mum and dad. From here on Hayden this it, make it or brake it , as its to hard to be snatched away from us every time because we are getting to close to us. Because you run to us when you see us and we pick you up they have interpreted this as you run to us because we spoil you and not because you just simply enjoy being with us as grandparents and its fun because when we are with you that's what we do , have fun and give you  our undivided attention.

They have miss understood us and its just not fare .

That is all for now I will write more when I feel a little happier.

I love you so much

Grandma